Have you ever had a dream and partway through you realized you were dreaming? Well, there's an entire community centered around recreating that, lucid dreaming: a dream in which the dreamer is conscious and aware of his/her surroundings.
It's no simple task, by any means. There are several core techniques, and dozens, if not hundreds of individual "spin-off" methods. Now, I'm not here to explain to you exactly how to lucid dream. There are plenty of easy to find online resources, such as Dream Views, but I've been trying off and on to lucid dream for a few years, and while I haven't put the dedication in to have much results, the effort I put into it, and the things I did while practicing, have helped.
Much of lucid dreaming is increasing one's awareness, meditating, and paying attention to one's dreams. Binaural beats and brainwave entrainment are also used to create brainwaves beneficial to lucid dreaming. The dreams themselves a great experience, and one that can be particularly therapeutic to an individual with Aspergers.
Anyone who hasn't heard of lucid dreaming: I urge you to look into it; if you don't succeed, the steps towards your goal can only help.
Saturday, August 3
Monday, July 29
Banishing minor depression
The way I see it, depression can manifest in many different ways, some of which can be rather subtle. It's possible to be depressed but also able to do everything you would normally do.
Feeling that way is miserable; it sucks all the joy out of you, but it isn't enough to be totally debilitating. Only enough to keep you from enjoying anything you do.
Fortunately, I find that it's not too hard to get rid of. The trick is to do something productive or helpful. Personally, writing something for my blog does a lot to shake my bad mood, and I've also done volunteer work that gave me a sense of purpose and worth.
Depression has a tendency to focus one's thoughts on him or herself, which inevitably leads to feelings of helplessness, worthlessness, or isolation. Don't let yourself believe that! Any act of benevolence, or good deed is worth a huge amount. Even something as minor as complimenting someone you know can greatly impact their lives.
Whenever you feel helpless, remember this: there are many stories floating around the internet of a suicidal person, preparing to end their lives, who meets a friendly stranger and changes their mind. Just imagine if you're small effort saves a life. You might never even know, so don't give up hope!
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Feeling that way is miserable; it sucks all the joy out of you, but it isn't enough to be totally debilitating. Only enough to keep you from enjoying anything you do.
Fortunately, I find that it's not too hard to get rid of. The trick is to do something productive or helpful. Personally, writing something for my blog does a lot to shake my bad mood, and I've also done volunteer work that gave me a sense of purpose and worth.
Depression has a tendency to focus one's thoughts on him or herself, which inevitably leads to feelings of helplessness, worthlessness, or isolation. Don't let yourself believe that! Any act of benevolence, or good deed is worth a huge amount. Even something as minor as complimenting someone you know can greatly impact their lives.
Whenever you feel helpless, remember this: there are many stories floating around the internet of a suicidal person, preparing to end their lives, who meets a friendly stranger and changes their mind. Just imagine if you're small effort saves a life. You might never even know, so don't give up hope!
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Sunday, July 28
Go move!
Depression is a deceptively debilitating ailment; although it seems to be a minor issue, it's anything but insignificant. Unfortunately, it's also one of the more difficult aspects of Aspergers to conquer.
The bright side of it is that it's incredibly simple to start treating.
The "secret" doesn't lie in complicated techniques; the secret, is moving. Simple physical motion is the fundamental base for dealing with depression.
The hard part, I can personally attest to, is finding motivation to actually get up.
Recently, I was in a depressed mood. It wasn't extremely horrible, but it was enough to ensure I couldn't enjoy anything I was doing. At first, I was too absorbed by my emotions to really deal with them, but after some time, I got hungry and was forced into cooking a meal. It helped a lot.
The biggest single thing is this: no matter how helpless you feel because of depression, even a simple change of immediate surroundings can give you an edge in coping.
This is Jordan fromteenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
The bright side of it is that it's incredibly simple to start treating.
The "secret" doesn't lie in complicated techniques; the secret, is moving. Simple physical motion is the fundamental base for dealing with depression.
The hard part, I can personally attest to, is finding motivation to actually get up.
Recently, I was in a depressed mood. It wasn't extremely horrible, but it was enough to ensure I couldn't enjoy anything I was doing. At first, I was too absorbed by my emotions to really deal with them, but after some time, I got hungry and was forced into cooking a meal. It helped a lot.
The biggest single thing is this: no matter how helpless you feel because of depression, even a simple change of immediate surroundings can give you an edge in coping.
This is Jordan fromteenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Upcoming Changes
It's been a while since the last time I posted, and to be honest, I've been rather lax with posting, which is not something I'm particularly happy about. I'm planning to devote more of my time to this project.
When I started with this blog I had the intention of writing - primarily - articles that focused on larg and complex issues. Guides or tutorials, if you will. That didn't work out very well for me. I found, after some time of writing in that style, that many paragraph "essays" are difficult to write quality content for, and that a lot of my best ideas can't be expanded into hundreds of words.
In the future I will be focusing more on consistent, shorter pieces, rather than large ones infrequently, and addition to this, I'm going to be adding content on more than simply ways of coping with Aspergers. That general idea is still what makes this blog what it is, but I believe the site will benefit from a larger variety of content.
When I started with this blog I had the intention of writing - primarily - articles that focused on larg and complex issues. Guides or tutorials, if you will. That didn't work out very well for me. I found, after some time of writing in that style, that many paragraph "essays" are difficult to write quality content for, and that a lot of my best ideas can't be expanded into hundreds of words.
In the future I will be focusing more on consistent, shorter pieces, rather than large ones infrequently, and addition to this, I'm going to be adding content on more than simply ways of coping with Aspergers. That general idea is still what makes this blog what it is, but I believe the site will benefit from a larger variety of content.
Tuesday, February 5
Why do people judge others?!
Damn it! I will never understand why some people are so brutish to each other. I mean, don't people respect other members of humanity? I was talking with a friend today, and that person was telling me how their church judged and shunned them for something that they did. While I get that churches do this type of thing, and maybe I shouldn't be bothered by it, It's depressing. I believe that you come to trust the church you go to and you should be able to trust the people in it.
It really does bother me though; I can relate to similar judgement from my old church. When my parents got divorced, there was a massive amount of accusation and strife going around - some true, some false - but the issue became inflamed; while I was not responsible for anything my parents did, I felt like my life and my personal issues were being put on display for everyone to see. It was like people were surveying me to decide if they should side with me, or if they should distance themselves from me.
Really, the thing that bothers me isn't judgement - the world contently judges, condemns, and tears into people; that's how life is - what really upsets me is how my and my friend's privacy were disrespected! I have a right to privacy in my life.
Me and my friend both lost out on opportunities because of the blindness of people we should have been able to trust. My friend was literally disallowed to participate in church-related activities and while I wasn't hurt that much, I couldn't stand staying, and I had to leave the church.
What I do is between me and anyone it affects - not anyone who fancies themselves qualified to judge!
There's no point to this post, I suppose. I mean, maybe that's life, or maybe it's an example of extreme ignorance, but I don't feel qualified to judge. Please leave comments of your opinions; all I can say is that it sucks.
It really does bother me though; I can relate to similar judgement from my old church. When my parents got divorced, there was a massive amount of accusation and strife going around - some true, some false - but the issue became inflamed; while I was not responsible for anything my parents did, I felt like my life and my personal issues were being put on display for everyone to see. It was like people were surveying me to decide if they should side with me, or if they should distance themselves from me.
Really, the thing that bothers me isn't judgement - the world contently judges, condemns, and tears into people; that's how life is - what really upsets me is how my and my friend's privacy were disrespected! I have a right to privacy in my life.
Me and my friend both lost out on opportunities because of the blindness of people we should have been able to trust. My friend was literally disallowed to participate in church-related activities and while I wasn't hurt that much, I couldn't stand staying, and I had to leave the church.
What I do is between me and anyone it affects - not anyone who fancies themselves qualified to judge!
There's no point to this post, I suppose. I mean, maybe that's life, or maybe it's an example of extreme ignorance, but I don't feel qualified to judge. Please leave comments of your opinions; all I can say is that it sucks.
Monday, February 4
Getting up early
While it's potentially tricky to manage, getting up early can also be fantastic! Personally, I hate mornings (see: four letter words), but I still try to get up early anyway.
I have to leave by 6:30 AM at the earliest, and 7 at the latest, though I attempt to haul my butt out of bed by 4 or 4:30. This ends up giving me around 3 hours of time for getting ready, and relaxing before I have to leave.
Being up before everyone else gives me some peace and quite that I really don't get at any other point once my day begins. Once I start getting ready, I have chores, school, homework, cooking, personal projects, and stuff to do for the rest of the day...
Which is all well and good, but it's also a pretty great feeling to have an hour or two before I have to do anything! And honestly, playing Minecraft and/or watch Star Trek once I'm ready to leave is awesome.
Additionally, getting up early acts as a safety net so that If I happen to oversleep, I'm not immediately late for school; When I do manage to get up right away though, there's plenty of time to prepare for the day, which is pretty sweet since it means I don't have to stress about anything in the morning.
I really do recommend trying it out if your schedule allows it. At worst, you'll find you can't manage it, and at best you'll have much more relaxing and enjoyable mornings.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Sunday, February 3
Help People
Do things to help people!
Volunteer, donate your time or your money, but be active in making the world a better place. Decrease world suck! Why?
Well, because the world needs it, but also because by helping people you increase your self-esteem and people love that!
People genuinely love other people who are confident and have high self-esteem. I can vouch for that. Someone who is so self-conscious that they don't do anything isn't someone I want to spend my time with, but people who are confident in themselves on the other hand... those are people who I try to get to know.
Helping people is a great way to improve self-esteem. I mean, you don't even have to do anything all that major. Just by doing little things you can make a difference, and that matters.
I did some volunteering with a local institution to help people with disabilities, and it made me feel so good to have been able to help people.
Really, if you're interested in bettering yourself, this is something you need to do. You can also do stuff online too. Sign up for forums or online volunteering projects, but do something!
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Volunteer, donate your time or your money, but be active in making the world a better place. Decrease world suck! Why?
Well, because the world needs it, but also because by helping people you increase your self-esteem and people love that!
People genuinely love other people who are confident and have high self-esteem. I can vouch for that. Someone who is so self-conscious that they don't do anything isn't someone I want to spend my time with, but people who are confident in themselves on the other hand... those are people who I try to get to know.
Helping people is a great way to improve self-esteem. I mean, you don't even have to do anything all that major. Just by doing little things you can make a difference, and that matters.
I did some volunteering with a local institution to help people with disabilities, and it made me feel so good to have been able to help people.
Really, if you're interested in bettering yourself, this is something you need to do. You can also do stuff online too. Sign up for forums or online volunteering projects, but do something!
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Go be social!
Get out there and talk to people! Make friends, be social. I know it's hard - I struggle with it myself. I get incredibly anxious when I talk to people I don't know very well, or when I try to do things with people, but trust me, it's worth it.
I do want to say though, that as anxious as I get when being social, succeeding in that area is very rewarding. Being lonely sucks, and the only way to stop being lonely is to take steps in making friends. Here are some things that I remember when I'm being social:
1 - Things are not inherently awkward!
Even if somethings feels uncomfortable, chances are you can change that. Whether it's your fault or not, being confident, even if it's not much can really help. If you have some sort of relationship with the people you're talking to, they're not going to just write you off. You're someone they know! They'll give you a chance if you ask for one. And if you don't know them, chances are that even if you screw-up somehow, it won't matter.
2 - Don't make things into a big deal.
Suppose someone you know invites you over, but they stutter or they say something weird? Would you judge them and make fun of them? No? Well then why would they, if the roles were reversed? Unless they're the kind of people who are shallow enough to get caught up on something like that, there's nothing you have to worry about. If they are people like that, then missing out on a friendship with them isn't worth very much. Realize that people are not hunting for ways to hurt you and go with the flow. If you don't get hung up on something, chances are, they won't either.
3 - Take small steps if you have to, but take those steps!
Practice makes perfect. I know that's cliche, but it's true. And not just because you get better at. By taking steps to be social, you desensitize yourself to the ordeal of making friends. By taking small steps you also ease into being closer friends with people.
4 - Compliments.
It's always a good idea to toss around a few compliments! People like people who like them - I think I heard that somewhere. If you want people to like you (and isn't that the point of being social?) then show some interest in their lives and interests, but keep in mind, you don't have to be terribly deep with your compliments - do you like their t-shirt? Something they said? Something they did? Just make sure you sincerely believe in what you're saying and you'll be good.
5 - Expand your horizons.
Being a varied person is wonderful when making friends. It lets you relate to more people in more ways, and it causes people to respect you more because you have broad interests. Whether they're interested in the same things as you are, they'll appreciate that you have the drive to explore new things.
6 - Don't limit yourself to "being yourself".
Be the best person you can be, don't stick with what you already are. Unless you've spent years shaping your personality and physique to be stellar (and even if you have) there's going to be room to improve yourself. Be the kind of person people like spending time with. Now, don't try to please everyone, but be a genuinely high-quality person and people will respond to that.
I do want to say though, that as anxious as I get when being social, succeeding in that area is very rewarding. Being lonely sucks, and the only way to stop being lonely is to take steps in making friends. Here are some things that I remember when I'm being social:
1 - Things are not inherently awkward!
Even if somethings feels uncomfortable, chances are you can change that. Whether it's your fault or not, being confident, even if it's not much can really help. If you have some sort of relationship with the people you're talking to, they're not going to just write you off. You're someone they know! They'll give you a chance if you ask for one. And if you don't know them, chances are that even if you screw-up somehow, it won't matter.
2 - Don't make things into a big deal.
Suppose someone you know invites you over, but they stutter or they say something weird? Would you judge them and make fun of them? No? Well then why would they, if the roles were reversed? Unless they're the kind of people who are shallow enough to get caught up on something like that, there's nothing you have to worry about. If they are people like that, then missing out on a friendship with them isn't worth very much. Realize that people are not hunting for ways to hurt you and go with the flow. If you don't get hung up on something, chances are, they won't either.
3 - Take small steps if you have to, but take those steps!
Practice makes perfect. I know that's cliche, but it's true. And not just because you get better at. By taking steps to be social, you desensitize yourself to the ordeal of making friends. By taking small steps you also ease into being closer friends with people.
4 - Compliments.
It's always a good idea to toss around a few compliments! People like people who like them - I think I heard that somewhere. If you want people to like you (and isn't that the point of being social?) then show some interest in their lives and interests, but keep in mind, you don't have to be terribly deep with your compliments - do you like their t-shirt? Something they said? Something they did? Just make sure you sincerely believe in what you're saying and you'll be good.
5 - Expand your horizons.
Being a varied person is wonderful when making friends. It lets you relate to more people in more ways, and it causes people to respect you more because you have broad interests. Whether they're interested in the same things as you are, they'll appreciate that you have the drive to explore new things.
6 - Don't limit yourself to "being yourself".
Be the best person you can be, don't stick with what you already are. Unless you've spent years shaping your personality and physique to be stellar (and even if you have) there's going to be room to improve yourself. Be the kind of person people like spending time with. Now, don't try to please everyone, but be a genuinely high-quality person and people will respond to that.
Saturday, February 2
High-Top Sneakers
Here's a tip I found after years of rage every time I went shoe shopping; look for high-top sneakers. Oh my god, this helped me so much! I apologize if this tip doesn't help, but it literally revolutionized my experience when shopping for shoes and I think everyone should at least know about it. Try it and see if it works for you - either way, let me know in the comments how it went.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Weight LIfting
Weight Lifting:
I'm no body builder, but I can tell you that exercise is really an awesome thing. I know that some people like running and sports and the like, but personally, I can't stand those things. They're exhausting, difficult, take lots of time and effort. To me, they're also rather boring. However, I find that lifting wights is a great form of exercise that's easier and more enjoyable than cardio. It helps reduce appetite, increases energy levels, and - but wait, I'm sure you're not here to read about that stuff. So, yeah, here's how it's applicable to Autism.
In essence, lifting weights reduces stress, and therefore reduces frustration. Moreover, this type of exercise helps to increase awareness and tolerance. It's hard to be annoyed with someone when you're all chilled out from lifting! Physical activity releases endorphin and dopamine in the brain which in turn cause relaxation.
There's not much to it as this article isn't meant as a tutorial on how to lift, but weight lifting is really awesome at reducing stress and frustration.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
I'm no body builder, but I can tell you that exercise is really an awesome thing. I know that some people like running and sports and the like, but personally, I can't stand those things. They're exhausting, difficult, take lots of time and effort. To me, they're also rather boring. However, I find that lifting wights is a great form of exercise that's easier and more enjoyable than cardio. It helps reduce appetite, increases energy levels, and - but wait, I'm sure you're not here to read about that stuff. So, yeah, here's how it's applicable to Autism.
In essence, lifting weights reduces stress, and therefore reduces frustration. Moreover, this type of exercise helps to increase awareness and tolerance. It's hard to be annoyed with someone when you're all chilled out from lifting! Physical activity releases endorphin and dopamine in the brain which in turn cause relaxation.
There's not much to it as this article isn't meant as a tutorial on how to lift, but weight lifting is really awesome at reducing stress and frustration.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off!
Thursday, September 27
Making Music
Hey guys!
I'm going to talk about something that I've found has helped my Aspergers. Well, that's not too odd for this particular blog, but I usually talk about methods or techniques specifically for coping with Aspergers. This thing - making music - isn't quite as direct in it's helpfulness. That's not to say it isn't helpful, it's very helpful, it's just less direct.
Anyway, now that I (hopefully) have your attention, yes. I'm talking about making music. Electronic music, anyway. Making music is one of the most amazing things I've ever done. The level of expression that you have at your fingertips when making music is astounding. I've been doing remixes, particularly of video game tracks, for about a year, but it wasn't until near the end of this summer that I really got into making my own, original music.
I make music in a program called a Digital Audio Workstation, DAW for short. It lets me make my music by dragging notes into the app, rather than by using an instrument. The DAW I use is called FL Studio. Others use DAWs like Cubase, Reason, or GarageBand(for macs). These are the more "high-end" programs, which can cost 200, or 300+ dollars, but there are less expensive, or even free DAWs out there. The workshop forums on ocremix.org, are a great resource for starting out. If you are new, read this: http://ocremix.org/forums/showthread.php?t=11586.
Making music is incredibly therapeutic. The level of expression you have at your finger tips, is amazing! You can make whatever you want and you can express yourself and communicate with others in a completely new way.
I highly, highly recommend experimenting with music production. It's not something you can immediately be good at; It took me at least a year before I was making music had any potential but it's worth it.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
I'm going to talk about something that I've found has helped my Aspergers. Well, that's not too odd for this particular blog, but I usually talk about methods or techniques specifically for coping with Aspergers. This thing - making music - isn't quite as direct in it's helpfulness. That's not to say it isn't helpful, it's very helpful, it's just less direct.
Anyway, now that I (hopefully) have your attention, yes. I'm talking about making music. Electronic music, anyway. Making music is one of the most amazing things I've ever done. The level of expression that you have at your fingertips when making music is astounding. I've been doing remixes, particularly of video game tracks, for about a year, but it wasn't until near the end of this summer that I really got into making my own, original music.
I make music in a program called a Digital Audio Workstation, DAW for short. It lets me make my music by dragging notes into the app, rather than by using an instrument. The DAW I use is called FL Studio. Others use DAWs like Cubase, Reason, or GarageBand(for macs). These are the more "high-end" programs, which can cost 200, or 300+ dollars, but there are less expensive, or even free DAWs out there. The workshop forums on ocremix.org, are a great resource for starting out. If you are new, read this: http://ocremix.org/forums/showthread.php?t=11586.
Making music is incredibly therapeutic. The level of expression you have at your finger tips, is amazing! You can make whatever you want and you can express yourself and communicate with others in a completely new way.
I highly, highly recommend experimenting with music production. It's not something you can immediately be good at; It took me at least a year before I was making music had any potential but it's worth it.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Tuesday, August 21
5 Tips for Surviving Assemblies and Meetings
If your like me, attending school assemblies and other kinds of meetings is a monumental challange. While "spirit week" type things are enjoyable and fun to most people, it's probably the opposite for you. With my school having their spirit week now, I think it's a good time to write an article on surviving assemblies.
Before I begin, I would like to say that last thursday of spirit week, I went to the first spirit week event, a complete new thing for me. I used all the following methods, and I suprised even myself with how well I did.
1 - Be Respectful
While not a step directly related to surviving assemblys, it goes without saying that being respectful helps people around you be more inclinded to help you. Having teachers who are willing to make some accommodations, gives you the upper hand, so to speak.
2 - Have a backup plan
Don't go into an assembly without a fall-back plan to kick in if you can't handle it. Try talking to teachers, or even the principal, and ask if you can have somewhere where you can go to cool of f if the assembly gets to you.
3 - Sit near an end (have an escape route)
If you can, and you should do what you need to in order to make sure you can, sit at the end of a row. I find that when I sit near the edge of a row I know I can leave subtly and easily whenever I need to. It also really helps because there are less people sitting next to you, even if the rest of the row is full.
4 - Don't stress out
Stressing out just makes things worse. The best mind set to have is one of determination, but levelheadedness also. If you aren't ready to go to a pep rally, it's not the end of the world. You can always try again later. By the same token, take your victories in steps if you have to. Even going to the assembly for seconds is still incredibly brave, and if you can do that, you should be proud. Even if you don't stay for the whole assembly, any amount of time you spend, whether that's 2 seconds, or 2 hours is still progress.
5 - Bring ear-buds or earplugs
Having something to blot out some of the noise helps a lot. When I went to the assembly, I brought some ear-buds and put some music on. It did the trick! I couldn't hear any of the cheering or yelling. The whole point of attending these assemblies is to get something out of them, so using ear-buds the whole time is unpractical. They do help immeasurably before and after the event, when it's the loudest.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Before I begin, I would like to say that last thursday of spirit week, I went to the first spirit week event, a complete new thing for me. I used all the following methods, and I suprised even myself with how well I did.
1 - Be Respectful
While not a step directly related to surviving assemblys, it goes without saying that being respectful helps people around you be more inclinded to help you. Having teachers who are willing to make some accommodations, gives you the upper hand, so to speak.
2 - Have a backup plan
Don't go into an assembly without a fall-back plan to kick in if you can't handle it. Try talking to teachers, or even the principal, and ask if you can have somewhere where you can go to cool of f if the assembly gets to you.
3 - Sit near an end (have an escape route)
If you can, and you should do what you need to in order to make sure you can, sit at the end of a row. I find that when I sit near the edge of a row I know I can leave subtly and easily whenever I need to. It also really helps because there are less people sitting next to you, even if the rest of the row is full.
4 - Don't stress out
Stressing out just makes things worse. The best mind set to have is one of determination, but levelheadedness also. If you aren't ready to go to a pep rally, it's not the end of the world. You can always try again later. By the same token, take your victories in steps if you have to. Even going to the assembly for seconds is still incredibly brave, and if you can do that, you should be proud. Even if you don't stay for the whole assembly, any amount of time you spend, whether that's 2 seconds, or 2 hours is still progress.
5 - Bring ear-buds or earplugs
Having something to blot out some of the noise helps a lot. When I went to the assembly, I brought some ear-buds and put some music on. It did the trick! I couldn't hear any of the cheering or yelling. The whole point of attending these assemblies is to get something out of them, so using ear-buds the whole time is unpractical. They do help immeasurably before and after the event, when it's the loudest.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
The importance of Perception and Atittude
With my experience dealing with Aspergers, and life in general, I have discovered just how significantly your own perception can affect, and even alter the things you experience. Before my school started back up for the year, for about a week, I was rather anxious about what might happen. Would I get stuck in a back seat? Would I act socially awkward? Would I...
The point being, I was freaking out! Every day that passed, I got worse, until the very thought of school would make me anxious. The day before school, I decided I was not going to let myself get upset anymore. I told myself I would be fine, and you know what? It worked. There were a few scheduling problems, one of which was very frustrating, but I refused to let it get to me.
Another time was when I started working on this article. I was sitting in my health class, with nothing to do. Instead of getting upset, I decided to write this. The class seemed to speed up, and it was over really soon. I was able to get through the class without it tainting the rest of my day. It could have easily gone south, but It didn't. The reason for that, is that I didn't let myself get upset; I used that time to be productive rather than simply waste the (valuable) time.
I'd like to call this a technique, but it's not one. It's a mindset. It's realizing that you are the most important factor in what your life is like. I've had my fair share of feeling hopeless because of my Aspergers before, but thinking this was has really helped. I've made this into a mantra for myself. If you've never heard of mantras before, they are a powerful way of affecting the subconscious. A mantra is a single thought, (or in some cases, an emotion) that you repeat in your mind. An example would be me verbalizing "I'm in control" whilst I'm having an anger outburst. Try it!
So much of a problem is in how you perceive it. When I have an argument with my Mom, for instance, it may seem like I'm totally right, but I try to give her the benefit of the doubt that I may be misjudging the situation. A lot of the time, trying to see the situation from her perspective allows me to calm down, and stop arguing. Instead of staying in the rut of my default perception, I try to see the situation in a more manageable way.
Sometimes for me, If I focus on my intellectual mind rather than my emotional mind, I can work my way through emotional situations. It's less a "look for a way to be better" mindset, and more of a "am I entitled to be angry?". I tend to get angry too often, so I try to evaluate my anger. Just using this as an example, it's fine to get angry as long as it's not out of proportion. That's what I try to remember when I'm upset. It helps for me to gauge how angry I am, whether that's a 1-10 scale, or a percentage of how angry I could be. I also decide how much anger I should have. If they don't match up, then I had a defective reaction. Just knowing that helps, because it's altering my perception.
Finally, and to wrap this post up, in order to do this, you have to actively be bettering yourself. When I was in class that one time, I didn't just randomly think of working on my blog. I thought of ways that I could use the time I had. So, when you have a problem, look for a way to make it better.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
The point being, I was freaking out! Every day that passed, I got worse, until the very thought of school would make me anxious. The day before school, I decided I was not going to let myself get upset anymore. I told myself I would be fine, and you know what? It worked. There were a few scheduling problems, one of which was very frustrating, but I refused to let it get to me.
Another time was when I started working on this article. I was sitting in my health class, with nothing to do. Instead of getting upset, I decided to write this. The class seemed to speed up, and it was over really soon. I was able to get through the class without it tainting the rest of my day. It could have easily gone south, but It didn't. The reason for that, is that I didn't let myself get upset; I used that time to be productive rather than simply waste the (valuable) time.
I'd like to call this a technique, but it's not one. It's a mindset. It's realizing that you are the most important factor in what your life is like. I've had my fair share of feeling hopeless because of my Aspergers before, but thinking this was has really helped. I've made this into a mantra for myself. If you've never heard of mantras before, they are a powerful way of affecting the subconscious. A mantra is a single thought, (or in some cases, an emotion) that you repeat in your mind. An example would be me verbalizing "I'm in control" whilst I'm having an anger outburst. Try it!
So much of a problem is in how you perceive it. When I have an argument with my Mom, for instance, it may seem like I'm totally right, but I try to give her the benefit of the doubt that I may be misjudging the situation. A lot of the time, trying to see the situation from her perspective allows me to calm down, and stop arguing. Instead of staying in the rut of my default perception, I try to see the situation in a more manageable way.
Sometimes for me, If I focus on my intellectual mind rather than my emotional mind, I can work my way through emotional situations. It's less a "look for a way to be better" mindset, and more of a "am I entitled to be angry?". I tend to get angry too often, so I try to evaluate my anger. Just using this as an example, it's fine to get angry as long as it's not out of proportion. That's what I try to remember when I'm upset. It helps for me to gauge how angry I am, whether that's a 1-10 scale, or a percentage of how angry I could be. I also decide how much anger I should have. If they don't match up, then I had a defective reaction. Just knowing that helps, because it's altering my perception.
Finally, and to wrap this post up, in order to do this, you have to actively be bettering yourself. When I was in class that one time, I didn't just randomly think of working on my blog. I thought of ways that I could use the time I had. So, when you have a problem, look for a way to make it better.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Monday, October 24
Shopping
Shopping, especially for clothes, is a very difficult chore. It's one of those things you don't want to do, but you have to do it... at least sometimes. Of course, you must know that from personal experience, in which case, on to the article!
Drink plenty of water
- All the malls, and many of the stores I've ever been to had water fountains. Because they are frequently near restrooms, corners, and other low-traffic areas, it's an excuse to get away from the noise. It's also great, because drinking water in general helps to reduce over-stimulation.
Browse around
- If your in the mall, take some time to visit stores that have merchandise you enjoy. Even if window shopping isn't your thing (I personally don't see the point...) , taking ten or fifteen minutes to read a book at a book store, or playing the demo of a new game can be very revitalizing, and I DO see the point of that.
Animals!
- While obviously not applicable to your typical store, some malls or complexes, have pet stores either as part of them, or in a nearby building. Like the previous point, taking time to visit these stores can be very helpful. In addition to simply being a welcome distraction to the noise and stress that is shopping, interacting with animals is also stress relieving by itself.
Bring an MP3 player
- In addition to relieving stress, listening to music also helps to drown out the noise of other people around you. And any pesky music that stores choose to play.
Last summer when I was picking out new shoes, one of the stores I went to, had rap music playing really, really loud over the speakers. It was so loud I had to raise my voice just so my mom could hear me talking. Fortunately, I had my cellphone and some ear buds to listen to music with, which really helped.
I hope that they is enough information in this article that you were able to get something out of it.
With a desire to make life easier for fellow aspies, this is Jordan Plutchok of teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Drink plenty of water
- All the malls, and many of the stores I've ever been to had water fountains. Because they are frequently near restrooms, corners, and other low-traffic areas, it's an excuse to get away from the noise. It's also great, because drinking water in general helps to reduce over-stimulation.
Browse around
- If your in the mall, take some time to visit stores that have merchandise you enjoy. Even if window shopping isn't your thing (I personally don't see the point...) , taking ten or fifteen minutes to read a book at a book store, or playing the demo of a new game can be very revitalizing, and I DO see the point of that.
Animals!
- While obviously not applicable to your typical store, some malls or complexes, have pet stores either as part of them, or in a nearby building. Like the previous point, taking time to visit these stores can be very helpful. In addition to simply being a welcome distraction to the noise and stress that is shopping, interacting with animals is also stress relieving by itself.
Bring an MP3 player
- In addition to relieving stress, listening to music also helps to drown out the noise of other people around you. And any pesky music that stores choose to play.
Last summer when I was picking out new shoes, one of the stores I went to, had rap music playing really, really loud over the speakers. It was so loud I had to raise my voice just so my mom could hear me talking. Fortunately, I had my cellphone and some ear buds to listen to music with, which really helped.
I hope that they is enough information in this article that you were able to get something out of it.
With a desire to make life easier for fellow aspies, this is Jordan Plutchok of teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Saturday, October 22
Music for Aspies
When talking about music, the thing that really pops out in my mind is that music has a way of leaping into you and forcing you to feel the emotion it wants you to feel.In virtually all commercials and movies, music is used extensively to evoke emotion. It's so common, that you probably have a few dozen examples already in your mind.
This unique power of music can also be used to counter Asperger mood swings, and the emotions that come with the crap life sometimes gives you.
Ironically, I find that listening to music that has the same emotion I'm feeling is what helps the most. It intensifies the emotions for a short time, burning them away, and when the song is over, I rarely feel anything more than the dying embers of what was an inferno of emotion.
I've gotten through some of the darkest times in my life by emptying my mind into the music I listened to. When life got tough, I was able to ignore it - if only for a short time - through music. Music is the closest thing to magic I've ever experienced, and really, wouldn't it be awesome if you could just use magic on Aspergers? Well...
I really urge you to at least try to use music like this. At worst it will be a chance to experience something you might not have otherwise experienced. At best, it may be one of the most useful coping strategies you will ever learn. It's really a win-win scenario.If I feel depressed, I listen to sad music and for some reason, it really helps me feel better. This song, Fade to black by Apocalyptica, is a really great example because it has so much emotion in it.
The intro feels mournful, but as the song progresses it gives me a sense of hope and fighting against the depression. By the end of the song, it has a victorious feeling; one that I want to be able to have about my life.
This song really expresses how I feel about my Aspergers. I'm sad and depressed abut it, but I'm fighting it, knowing one day I'll beat it.
I really hope that you feel that way too, and if not, I hope that I can help you feel that way, or better through this blog.
You can check out my Music Gallery if you want suggestions on emotional music. And who knows, you might find something that really moves you.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Saturday, October 8
Success
As you've been dealing with Aspergers, be that days, weeks, months, or years, I'm sure you have wondered what It would be like without Aspergers, and what it will be like when you are able to minimize it. "What might it be like when I'm successful in this war?". Sound familiar? Okay, you probably don't think that way, but my point is to bring up success, hence the title.
If you've never done something like this before, read the next few sentences and try it out. Close your eyes, stop paying attention to your surroundings, and imagine yourself without Aspergers. What does it look like? Is it indescribable? Your biggest enemy in life bowing at your feet surrendering.
When you reach that point, do you picture yourself visiting a docter who tells you there's nothing wrong with you? Do you simply imagine how it would be to appear and feel normal? I can't answer that for you, that's something you need to do.
Where am I going with this? I'm trying to get at the fact that how you picture your future is important. It comes down to what you want out of life. Does success mean fitting in while in public? Does it mean being an amazing and outgoing individual? Or does it simply mean having emotional control?
For me, I don't want to be just average. If I was average, I wouldn't be writing a blog to help people (and myself at that).
Ask yourself, do I really want to be average? Can you minimize the negative effects of Aspergers and nurture the positive ones? Only you define what success is for yourself, and that's what you aim for. You decide when your happy with yourself.
The important part is that you get to decide what you want to be.
It's something to think about at least. Remember, ruminating on things makes you a better person. This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Sunday, September 18
Aspergers is like wine: it get's better with age
Not that I have any experience with wine though... yeah.
Anyway, I just want to write for a second about something I read a little while ago. I was surfing the web trying to find something related to Aspergers interesting enough to read, and I found a yahoo questions post asking if Aspergers gets worse as you get older.
I think this is the opposite of the truth. As you get older, I find, you get tired of the Aspergers and you learn ways to make it easier for yourself. As long as you have a desire to get better when you grow, the Aspergers problems diminish, and the benefits of it grow.
When I was younger I would have frequent outbursts of anger, and I was very sensetive to sound and touch, and just about everything. Now that i'm older, I learned several ways to be able to cope, and I have much less anger and I can tolerate more things.
For example: when I was younger my dogs barking would drive me crazy. Now when they bark though, I can tolerate it better, and it doesn't really affect me.
For example: when I was younger my dogs barking would drive me crazy. Now when they bark though, I can tolerate it better, and it doesn't really affect me.
This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Basic Meditation
Meditation is a good tool to have. There are many aspects of meditation, but for now, i'm going to wright a basic technique that you can do for only 10-15 minutes a day. You can do it whenever is convenient, but I find that it's best to do before bed.
During the day your brain has to process the information it is receiving. Whenever you do anything, it adds to the data you have to process.
Taking 10 or 15 minutes to lets your conscious mind rest, and sort out that information helps very much to reduce stress. It's good to use before bed, because it is relaxing and also helps to slow down any racing thoughts you may be having.
Just sit or lie in bed, or a chair if you want, close your eyes, and let you thoughts wander. You'll likely start thinking about something that happened to you, or something that's been on your mind. After a little while, your thoughts should slow down. When this happens, you know the meditation worked, as that's the goal. To slow down your thoughts.
That's it. It's just that simple. This is the basis of most, if not all meditation techniques. You can deep breath if you want, and that can make it more relaxing, but I don't think it's necessary. It's just a matter of turning your attention away from the things happening around you and focusing on your own thoughts.
During the day your brain has to process the information it is receiving. Whenever you do anything, it adds to the data you have to process.
Taking 10 or 15 minutes to lets your conscious mind rest, and sort out that information helps very much to reduce stress. It's good to use before bed, because it is relaxing and also helps to slow down any racing thoughts you may be having.
Just sit or lie in bed, or a chair if you want, close your eyes, and let you thoughts wander. You'll likely start thinking about something that happened to you, or something that's been on your mind. After a little while, your thoughts should slow down. When this happens, you know the meditation worked, as that's the goal. To slow down your thoughts.
That's it. It's just that simple. This is the basis of most, if not all meditation techniques. You can deep breath if you want, and that can make it more relaxing, but I don't think it's necessary. It's just a matter of turning your attention away from the things happening around you and focusing on your own thoughts.
Saturday, September 17
Acceptance
Acceptance is, at least for me, the holy grail of fighting Aspergers. It towers light years above anything else I've learned or tried my whole life, and if I could only learn one thing to use against my AS, this would be it.
Acceptance is a mindset that is formed through experience, practice, and devotion. Acceptance is one of the hardest things to master in life, but also one of the most useful. It is possible, just not easy. But when has beating up Aspergers ever been easy.
Forming a mindset of acceptance, will help with any number of problems that you may encounter in life, but for the sake of explanation, I'll use Aspergers as an example.
Acceptance, is one part acknowledgement, and one part denial. It took me a while to understand it myself, but when I did, I came up with this.
You acknowledge something bad happened or is happening, but you deny it has any control over you. By deny, I mean you don't let the fact that you found out you have Aspergers in and of itself bother you.
The actual Aspergers symptoms may affect you, but the name doesn't have to. And for the symptoms, you can fight them, so don't get discouraged. That's the worst of things you could do.
By acknowledging that it really does stink to have Aspergers, and you do have it, you aren't ignoring any strong emotions. Ignoring things like this, may not always blow up in your face, but it's never good for you.
Acknowledging your feelings does not mean beating yourself up over having them, because in all honesty, it does suck to have Aspergers, and that feeling is justified. It just means facing those emotions in the eye and saying "Get away from me, you are useless, and I choose to ignore you."
You can't let dealing with strong emotions drag you into an emotional abyss though, which leads quite well into the second part of acceptance: denial. Denial in this context, means a refusal to let something affect you.
If that something happens to be depression or anger over having Aspergers, then denial is a good thing. Getting all bent out of shape over something you can't change won't do any good. After all, Aspergers is just a name.
The actual symptoms of AS may not be something you can fix simply through will power alone, but letting the name affect you won't help. I know I just said it one sentence ago, but I want to hammer it into your head, because it took me a long time to learn this.
After several years of not accepting my Aspergers, I eventually found a better way, acceptance, and ever since them I have been so much better with most of the symptoms, because I don't have negative emotions seething under the surface. If you get anything at all from this post at all, please let it be at least this:
Getting upset over a name won't help!!!!
Acceptance is truly the best tool to use in the war against Aspergers in my experience. Just remember acknowladgement and denial. This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Acceptance is a mindset that is formed through experience, practice, and devotion. Acceptance is one of the hardest things to master in life, but also one of the most useful. It is possible, just not easy. But when has beating up Aspergers ever been easy.
Forming a mindset of acceptance, will help with any number of problems that you may encounter in life, but for the sake of explanation, I'll use Aspergers as an example.
Acceptance, is one part acknowledgement, and one part denial. It took me a while to understand it myself, but when I did, I came up with this.
You acknowledge something bad happened or is happening, but you deny it has any control over you. By deny, I mean you don't let the fact that you found out you have Aspergers in and of itself bother you.
The actual Aspergers symptoms may affect you, but the name doesn't have to. And for the symptoms, you can fight them, so don't get discouraged. That's the worst of things you could do.
By acknowledging that it really does stink to have Aspergers, and you do have it, you aren't ignoring any strong emotions. Ignoring things like this, may not always blow up in your face, but it's never good for you.
Acknowledging your feelings does not mean beating yourself up over having them, because in all honesty, it does suck to have Aspergers, and that feeling is justified. It just means facing those emotions in the eye and saying "Get away from me, you are useless, and I choose to ignore you."
You can't let dealing with strong emotions drag you into an emotional abyss though, which leads quite well into the second part of acceptance: denial. Denial in this context, means a refusal to let something affect you.
If that something happens to be depression or anger over having Aspergers, then denial is a good thing. Getting all bent out of shape over something you can't change won't do any good. After all, Aspergers is just a name.
The actual symptoms of AS may not be something you can fix simply through will power alone, but letting the name affect you won't help. I know I just said it one sentence ago, but I want to hammer it into your head, because it took me a long time to learn this.
After several years of not accepting my Aspergers, I eventually found a better way, acceptance, and ever since them I have been so much better with most of the symptoms, because I don't have negative emotions seething under the surface. If you get anything at all from this post at all, please let it be at least this:
Getting upset over a name won't help!!!!
Acceptance is truly the best tool to use in the war against Aspergers in my experience. Just remember acknowladgement and denial. This is Jordan from teenaspergers.blogspot.com signing off.
Saturday, August 13
A few things I did to get through school for the first time
Recently I've been thinking about how I made it past many of the struggles that I've had when I was younger, and how this past school year I had much, much less difficulty than I had expected.
Many of the things that would have been hard for me no less than a year or two ago were actually not that hard when I encountered them now.
My whole life until this year, I was home schooled. So as you can imagine, the first year of public school, also being high school, is no walk in the park, especially for someone with Aspergers.
I ended the year with all A grades, made some friends, went to honors classes, and even started an after school club. I say that to make the point that even though I have Aspergers, I made it through school with flying colors.
This, along with a conversation I had with my mother where she was telling me that she, and a lot of the people in my school had noticed how in-tune I am with my emotions, helped me to realize how much I had changed. I agree with that, even though up until recently I took it for granted.
So, after thinking about it for a while, I decided on what helped me the most. Really, it wasn't medicine or any other kind of treatment. What helped me the most, was actually the way I was thinking.
When I was younger, I would complain about how unfair it was having Aspergers, and that life was too hard for me because of my Aspergers. I wanted it to just go away so I could be normal. Naturally, I had an exceptional difficulty coping with life thinking that way.
Now when I think about my Aspergers, it doesn't bother me as much. I realize it's just a part of who I am, and there are even things that I gain from having it. I don't complain about how unfair it is, and I don't just give up if something is hard because of having Aspergers.
When that happens, I pull out my claws and dig into the situation trying to find some way to get over whatever challenge I may be having. Sometimes it takes a really long time, but I don't give up.
To give you an example, take my school. My school is not really any different than any other school. It's small, having around 500 students, but the students and the teachers are just like any other students and teachers from other schools.
And other than my Aspergers I'm just like any other person. No superpowers or anything. At least not the last time I checked.
So how did I do so well, you may ask. It was the way I thought. The first day, I decided I was capable of an A grade, and that anything less was being lazy, so I did everything I could to get that grade. Sometimes I would have to stay after school to learn more about a certain topic to accomplish my goal, but it was worth it, and in the end I did get that A grade I wanted.
I found a challenge and accepted it. Then, I didn't back down until I beat that challenge. I had a hands-on attitude of: "I'm going to do what it takes to get this grade!". I also had to be aware of how I was feeling emotional. If I was feeling stressed and it was making school hard for me, I knew it, and made an effort to be less stressed.
Similarly, if I felt confused about something, I would take time to talk to a teacher. It was more attitude and emotional awareness than it was intelligence, because if I hadn't had the those two aspects, I would never have got that A.
I had acceptance, emotional awareness, and a willingness to work at getting better, and they all helped me through the year. They are three of the most important steps towards overcoming any problem in life.
Many of the things that would have been hard for me no less than a year or two ago were actually not that hard when I encountered them now.
My whole life until this year, I was home schooled. So as you can imagine, the first year of public school, also being high school, is no walk in the park, especially for someone with Aspergers.
I ended the year with all A grades, made some friends, went to honors classes, and even started an after school club. I say that to make the point that even though I have Aspergers, I made it through school with flying colors.
This, along with a conversation I had with my mother where she was telling me that she, and a lot of the people in my school had noticed how in-tune I am with my emotions, helped me to realize how much I had changed. I agree with that, even though up until recently I took it for granted.
So, after thinking about it for a while, I decided on what helped me the most. Really, it wasn't medicine or any other kind of treatment. What helped me the most, was actually the way I was thinking.
When I was younger, I would complain about how unfair it was having Aspergers, and that life was too hard for me because of my Aspergers. I wanted it to just go away so I could be normal. Naturally, I had an exceptional difficulty coping with life thinking that way.
Now when I think about my Aspergers, it doesn't bother me as much. I realize it's just a part of who I am, and there are even things that I gain from having it. I don't complain about how unfair it is, and I don't just give up if something is hard because of having Aspergers.
When that happens, I pull out my claws and dig into the situation trying to find some way to get over whatever challenge I may be having. Sometimes it takes a really long time, but I don't give up.
To give you an example, take my school. My school is not really any different than any other school. It's small, having around 500 students, but the students and the teachers are just like any other students and teachers from other schools.
And other than my Aspergers I'm just like any other person. No superpowers or anything. At least not the last time I checked.
So how did I do so well, you may ask. It was the way I thought. The first day, I decided I was capable of an A grade, and that anything less was being lazy, so I did everything I could to get that grade. Sometimes I would have to stay after school to learn more about a certain topic to accomplish my goal, but it was worth it, and in the end I did get that A grade I wanted.
I found a challenge and accepted it. Then, I didn't back down until I beat that challenge. I had a hands-on attitude of: "I'm going to do what it takes to get this grade!". I also had to be aware of how I was feeling emotional. If I was feeling stressed and it was making school hard for me, I knew it, and made an effort to be less stressed.
Similarly, if I felt confused about something, I would take time to talk to a teacher. It was more attitude and emotional awareness than it was intelligence, because if I hadn't had the those two aspects, I would never have got that A.
I had acceptance, emotional awareness, and a willingness to work at getting better, and they all helped me through the year. They are three of the most important steps towards overcoming any problem in life.
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