Go be social!

Get out there and talk to people! Make friends, be social. I know it's hard - I struggle with it myself. I get incredibly anxious when I talk to people I don't know very well, or when I try to do things with people, but trust me, it's worth it.

I do want to say though, that as anxious as I get when being social, succeeding in that area is very rewarding. Being lonely sucks, and the only way to stop being lonely is to take steps in making friends. Here are some things that I remember when I'm being social:

1 - Things are not inherently awkward!
Even if somethings feels uncomfortable, chances are you can change that. Whether it's your fault or not, being confident, even if it's not much can really help. If you have some sort of relationship with the people you're talking to, they're not going to just write you off. You're someone they know! They'll give you a chance if you ask for one. And if you don't know them, chances are that even if you screw-up somehow, it won't matter.

2 - Don't make things into a big deal.
Suppose someone you know invites you over, but they stutter or they say something weird? Would you judge them and make fun of them? No? Well then why would they, if the roles were reversed? Unless they're the kind of people who are shallow enough to get caught up on something like that, there's nothing you have to worry about. If they are people like that, then missing out on a friendship with them isn't worth very much. Realize that people are not hunting for ways to hurt you and go with the flow. If you don't get hung up on something, chances are, they won't either.

3 - Take small steps if you have to, but take those steps!
Practice makes perfect. I know that's cliche, but it's true. And not just because you get better at. By taking steps to be social, you desensitize yourself to the ordeal of making friends. By taking small steps you also ease into being closer friends with people.

4 - Compliments.
It's always a good idea to toss around a few compliments! People like people who like them - I think I heard that somewhere. If you want people to like you (and isn't that the point of being social?) then show some interest in their lives and interests, but keep in mind, you don't have to be terribly deep with your compliments - do you like their t-shirt? Something they said? Something they did? Just make sure you sincerely believe in what you're saying and you'll be good.

5 - Expand your horizons.
Being a varied person is wonderful when making friends. It lets you relate to more people in more ways, and it causes people to respect you more because you have broad interests. Whether they're interested in the same things as you are, they'll appreciate that you have the drive to explore new things.

6 - Don't limit yourself to "being yourself".
Be the best person you can be, don't stick with what you already are. Unless you've spent years shaping your personality and physique to be stellar (and even if you have) there's going to be room to improve yourself. Be the kind of person people like spending time with. Now, don't try to please everyone, but be a genuinely high-quality person and people will respond to that.